Monday, July 26, 2010

Yo-Ho-Ho and a Box of Crap

When you inherit a new job, you also inherit all the crap that the person before you left. The previous owner of my job had been in it for more than ten years, leaving a lot of time for her to gather crap of all kinds. Here are some highlights from what I have found in what I’m calling “The Great Purge of 2010.” (P.S. I wonder how many bulimic girls will be highly disappointed when Google turns this up as they try to find sound dieting advice…)

1. A training manual for Windows ’95. I jokingly offered it back to the lady (who now works in a different department), and she said, “Yeah, I might want to hold on to that. It could be useful.” She was NOT joking.
2. Internal maintenance receipts for changed light bulbs in a building we are no longer in. From 2004.
3. A kite.
4. Enough ribbon to fill a 2x2 box.
5. Pictures of her dog and backyard.
6. Twelve wicker baskets (for what?)
7. Six boxes of bubbles.
8. Approximately 4,217 empty three-ring binders
9. Photocopies in triplicate of every invoice since 2006

10. Floppy disks
11. A sparkling curtain for a doorway, a-la any 13-year old's room
12. Precisely 2500 envelopes. Which will take us around 13 years to use.

This would be why they were running out of storage space.